Yikes!

The Wrong Mindset

It's time for my regular rant about the Mindset List.

In case you're unfamiliar: Beloit College, a liberal-arts school in Southern Wisconsin (that's in Ripon's conference), puts out this thing every year called the Mindset List. A few humanities or social sciences professors sit around and list a whole bunch of cultural references that, while familiar to adults, are not familiar to 18-year old freshman. To read the mindset list, click here.

A few years ago, I wrote a long rant explaining how stupid this list is. (You can find it here... It was back in the days when this blog was far more expletive-filled.) Basically, it came down to two big problems with the list:

1. It assumes 18-year old students can't relate to cultural references to anything that happened before 1990 or so.
   
   
2. It places far too much importance on relatively meaningless trivia. For example, this year's list explains that to this year's incoming freshmen:

   12. Smoking has never been permitted on U.S. airlines.
   15. They have never had to distinguish between the St. Louis Cardinals baseball and football teams.
   25. Phantom of the Opera has always been on Broadway.
   29. Computerized player pianos have always been tinkling in the lobby.
   42. Ken Burns has always been producing very long documentaries on PBS.

   Do these things have anything to do with the mindset of 18-year-olds? With the exception of those 18-year-olds who are huge Arizona Cardinals fans, I think not.

Anyway, this year's rant is a short one because I got beat to it by Chris Heard (who is himself a college professor), who trashes this year's list in a snarky blog post. The highlight:

Okay, I don’t want to through each of the 75 items like this. Most of the rest could be grouped into such categories as “false,” “overstated,” or “irrelevant.” What the list really boils down to is this: the members of the class of 2010 take for granted some things that earlier generations lived through. Wow. What a revelation.

Amen. As I wrote two years ago, if college professors really cared about the mindset of their new students (and not just the fact that they grew up riding in minivans and listening to canned lobby music), then maybe they'd sit down with these (presumably bright) 18-year-olds and ask them, "Tell me about the world you live in."

Christ Almighty!

My college journalism professor (though he's technically a professor of leadership studies) is well known in Ripon for having a funny-looking last name: J. Christ. Of course, Jack's last name is pronounced like "Krist" (rhymes with "fist"). It always gives incoming freshmen a laugh, and cracked me up every time I got an email from ChristJ@ripon.edu.

Well, it turns out Jack is now famous. In response to a news story about a used car salesman named Wayne Schmuck, Slate.com ran a piece on "aptronyms," names that inadvertently describes their bearers' occupation.

Of course, they list Dr. Christ, a professor of leadership studies.

Quote of the Day

"When I'm on the pooper I'm not accessible to my floor, and sometimes that can be as long as a Bible study."
- Adam Hetz, a sophomore RA at my alma mater, explaining to the campus paper that his involvement in Campus Christian Fellowship doesn't interfere with his job

Windows in Classrooms

Esther mentioned last night that when she walked around HUC's LA campus (where I'll be going to school when I get back from Israel) she noticed that the classrooms don't have windows.

I'd never thought about it, but when I did, I realized that few of my classrooms at Ripon had windows. No windows in Todd Wehr, few windows in East Hall, no windows in Rodman.

Then I thought: Does this make a difference? I think it probably doesn't... In fact, I think I prefer classrooms without windows. There's less to look at, and so there's less to distract me.

Wierd

Sarah Hoffman:
Josh-Hater

There was this girl I went to college with, Sarah Hoffman. She was in a whole bunch of my classes, since we were both religion majors.

It turns out she totally hated me. And I had no idea. I mean, we definitely weren't friends. And she kept very quiet in class. But it turns out that all that time -- while she was sitting there, across from me, keeping her mouth shut -- she was secretly hating me.

Esther found Sarah's blog online today, and I'm mentioned several times.

It all starts here, where she says:

I think the main problem is that I am letting myself get nervous about the whole thing [the reading for class, and the fact that the prof. might call on her]. I mean, it's only 6 people to giggle at me, but STILL... I just don't want to look stupid, I guess. *panic panic* Why does Prof. Smith DO this? Why can't he just have the people who LIKE to talk in class do this? Oh, yeah: because one can only take so much of Josh Barkin's rambling before they want to pull an Oedipus. And he is the only person who talks on a regular basis.

Now, granted, I normally talk. A lot. And very fast. But I don't like to talk in class, I never have. Something about how the other students look at you. Or something like that.

Yikes. I made her want to gouge her eyes out. This is very shocking to me... I was that bad? Of course, a few days later, she gets excited about not having religion class, and says:

Today I didn't have my religion class. In other words, my day was 100% Josh Barkin free! Yeehaaa! I need a lot more of those.

Anyway, she goes on to rant about me several more times in the year or so that she maintained the blog, a fact which totally freaks me out. Here's a girl to whom I never gave a second thought, and it turns out she hated my guts. Very wierd. Did they sit around the Tau lounge talking about how much they hated me? I get mentioned again here, but the take-the-cake entry is this one:

Friday night, I gave Vin a heart attack-- I made up a bunch of stuff when she asked what she had missed in class that day. I told her that she would be in charge of the class discussion on Monday, and she looked terrified/irritated/other wild Vin emotions. Then I told her the truth-- a two-page paper on what we thought of Josh's rant. I thought it was STUPID, mainly because it was about pineapples, oranges, and cars... and we were SUPPOSED to be talking about God.

This is another reason why I do not care for Mr. Barkin: his rants turn into essays for everyone else. And this was no ordinary rant. First of all, he filled the board THREE TIMES! I don't understand these people who love chalk. You know the type. Well, Vin does, anyway. They get a piece of chalk and suddenly they are Powerful. They have the Power to Write on a Chalkboard. When I am forced to use chalk, I write down maybe three things. Four, if I am feeling extra creative. But Josh? I think he gets off on using chalk.

Secondly, he offended Johanna. She was foaming at the mouth due to a comment he made about Jesus. Now, Johanna is a nice girl. She did not deserve the comment made. I felt bad, but I did not want to get slurped into this discussion, so I kept quiet. Next time, however, I will walk over and smack Josh. Tee hee!

Thirdly, he got into a debate with Prof. Smith. Argh. Argh. ARGH! This lasted a good 35 minutes. It would have gone on longer, but class was over and people were fleeing the scene. Vin, I really hope you appreciate that you missed it!

Gulity as charged. Chalk gets me off. And was it my fault that Sarah and Viola never talked in class? Benita and Johanna talked, and, as I recall, Johanna defended herself when I made the Jesus comment. I remember the day she's talking about vividly. Dr. Smith used to make us each take turns leading the class, and it was my fucking turn, so I wrote on the chalk board.

Anyway, Sarah, if you ever do read my blog (which is not inconceivable seeing as I just read yours), I'm sorry that I annoyed you so much back in College.

What's it DOING in Atlantic City? Recirculating.

Someone at Ripon should
say thanks to Alex Wente '06.
He's the reason I gave them money.

There are not many people I know who are goofier looking than Rob Lennox.

Alex Wente may be. And he's Robs's little bro, which means they put all the goofy-looking people together.

He called me on February 24 to ask me to give money to Ripon College. He's working for the Phonathon (or the Phonarama or the Phona-rama-lama-ding-dong or whatever the hell they call it) and he got the card with my name on it. He called me, identified himself as an OX, and asked for the big bucks.

This was a dilemma for me. When I graduated, having spent a couple of years working for the Office of Alumni and Parent Relations (who spend all their time kissing alumni ass so as to increase donations to the College... trust me, if we were all poor, the College wouldn't give a rat's ass about alumni), I told myself that I'd never make a donation to the Annual Fund, and that the only donations I would ever give that crazy fucked up place would be to OX and the religion department.

Point is, I'm not a big fan of many of the people who run the College, or of the decisions they make. As an alum, my money is really the only vote I have, and giving them a donation implies approval of the job they're doing.

But how could I say no to Alex Wente? I mean, look at him! How could anyone say no to that face? (I'm sure many many Ripon girls have a good answer to that question, but I didn't...) So I donated some money... not a lot, seeing as my Puma obsession is beginning to get costly and I have, uh, rent. But some, and definitely more than I would have expected to on graduation day. It's just that Alex is so goofy looking that I couldn't say no.

Reasons to give money to Alex Wente:

1. He's goofy looking.
2. He's skinnier than Leighton Cooper.
3. He's good friends with Tony Graffanino.
4. He's almost as cool as J.P. Garafalo.
5. He's not Ben Gabor.

My tip to the Ripon College Office of Development: Hire Alex Wente to call all the alums.

What?

Did Okimoto get married?

The email said, "...but all mail sent to my old address will be forwarded to my wife Michelle..."

Wife? Yikes.

Uh, congratulations, Stroke.

New Ripon Blog of the Day

"Nada Mucho", containing "boring personal details" pertaining to the life of Benita.

Another Ripon Alum Blog

Check out Librarian Levin, where "you're sure to find the steamy adventures of Rachael Adele, live from library school in Boston."

Rachael's adventures don't seem to be that steamy (she and Loren keep that to themselves, thankfully), but she is the latest entry into what is becoming a trend.

I think the Ripon College Magazine needs to do an article on alumni blogs. We all got used to being surrounded by people on this little campus where we're all forced to listen to each other blather (because it's so freakin' cold outside and there's nothing else to do), so now we all write blogs. As Rachael says, "Ripon breeds talkers."

Did some looking... Another blog from a Ripon alumna: Sabrina Biffer.

So how many Ripon blogs are there? Hmm...
Me, Rob, Jake, Phil, Bade, Dave & Dante, Scott, Luke, Rachael, Sabrina B., Max, Martha, Joe. That's all I know or was able to Google. Are there more?

Do you know Joel Grishaver?

Joel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel Grishaver I know a guy named Joel Grishaver. Isn't that a funny name? Well, it's true. His name really is Joel Grishaver. Joel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel GrishaverJoel Grishaver